egocentric

having little or no regard for interests, beliefs, or attitudes other than one's own

this is so often my initial response.  disgusting.   it is being revealed to me increasingly more often.  i have a feeling the next year will bring even further opportunities for me to find evidence of my depravity.  


it isn't and shouldn't be about me.  i repeat to myself.


while i should rejoice in the pleasures of others, my heart sunk to the floor in disappointment.


as i become rooted in who i am, my role. i am learning to accept, and love. in a new way.  processing bumps in my path without losing my identity.


may the "perfectly proper princess" be as much true on the inside as she desires to be on the outside.


internal struggle.

He loves...

He loves me, he loves me not, ...

He.

 loves.

me.

Bible Verse #5

This week, I really feel the desire to focus not on what God can do for me and how I can benefit from Him, but more so on who he is in all of his glory.  I think this verse may sum up the gospel and praise Him in that way. 

Now to him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to present you blameless before the presence of his glory with great joy, to the only God, our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord, be glory, majesty, dominion, and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen.  Jude 1:24-25

On a side note, my life has been such a juxtaposition of joy and heartache in recent weeks.  I am anxious to find the words and place to rest in writing these thoughts and emotions in this space.  Hopefully, I will be back here for real blogging again, soon.

Bible Verse #4

My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,
when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night;
for you have been my help,
and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy.
Psalm 63: 5-7

Bible Verse #3

I'm a few days late this week in what I thought was because I was being a bit negligent.  I couldn't seem to find just the right verse.  It turns out that I did not know everything that I needed to know to choose the one that would be most meaningful at this time.  Friday, it was determined. 

It is the Lord who goes before you.  He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you.  Do not fear or be dismayed.  Deuteronomy 31:8 ESV

It was only a few months ago that this truth was so evident to me.  Now, I need to rest in it again.  My heart is so heavy for this situation. 

Bible Verse #2

Wow!  This past verse has proven to be true in my life.  My work.  My heart.  My relationships.  I have been overwhelmed in recent weeks by the support of my community.  There is a flutter inside me. 

   I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart;
I will recount all of your wonderful deeds.
   I will be glad and exult in you;
I will sing praise to your name, O Most High.
                Psalm 9:1-2 ESV

Bible Verse #1

“Do not call to mind the former things,
         Or ponder things of the past.
“Behold, I will do something new,
         Now it will spring forth;
        Do you not perceive it?
         I will even make a roadway in the wilderness,
         Rivers in the desert."
                            Isaiah 43: 18-19 NASB/ESV